In Honor of "My Only Love"

I know it’s not November yet, but it’s not too early to be thankful. In fact, every day is an opportunity to be thankful. Today, I am thanking God for my husband. Today, I traveled with him on his “missions” to a few of the nineteen Safeway stores he works in, in the Portland area. It’s something I normally don’t do, but I didn’t have anything big going on today, and to be honest—I really just wanted to be with him.

I got to do a bit of writing and some computer filing (i.e., recycling and reorganizing documents) while he was doing his various projects, so I wasn’t bored while he was working—and in between each job I got to ride beside him in the car, talk with him, laugh with him, and hold his hand.

Not every guy would want his wife tagging along while he went to assorted job sites, but mine was more than appreciative for my company. I found myself feeling very grateful today that he is my husband and not someone else’s—and after 27 years of marriage, beginning to take to heart his reminiscences of when he met me, the day we got married, etc. He actually makes reference to things like that quite often, always with an emphasis on how beautiful he thought I was—and still am—and how lucky he has always felt for getting me to be his wife. I’ve just never truly appreciated how very cool that is. But as God does a new work in my heart…I’m starting to.

My husband looks for little ways to bless me—buying me a coffee; doing the dishes; doing a project he knows I’ve been wanting finished (like when he and our son built a fire pit while I was at the women’s retreat); giving me regular massages; fixing problems I incur on my computer; bringing me a clean, warm towel for my shower; even making me breakfast. He’s simply super sweet and thoughtful.

My wonderful man is always telling me how He can’t believe God blessed him with me; today I find myself full of gratitude that God chose to bless me with him. I don’t think a more loving, doting, capable, talented, intelligent husband could be found. And what’s more—he supports and encourages me in all my endeavors; he truly believes in me—and many times, his belief in me has far outweighed my belief in myself.

I have a spouse who loves the Lord and wants to follow Him in whatever steps—big or small—He may want us to take. We are a team, and I sensed this in my spirit in a very big way today. Of course, we were joined in marriage 27 years ago…but there’s a new “joining” that is taking place that goes far beyond that initial “I do.”

Speaking of marriage, Jesus said in Mark, chapter 10, “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” I believe Jesus was making an important declaration about marriage here that went deeper than just answering the crowd’s questions. To separate means “to keep apart or divide, as by an intervening barrier or space; to put, bring, or force apart; to set apart; disconnect; dissociate.” Jesus knew that our enemy would want nothing better than to divide and conquer in marriage—that he would use lies and trickery, and even our own minds against us. 

Jesus emphasized the holiness of this union by going all the way back to creation to describe God’s perfect design, followed by the miracle of becoming “one flesh.” He was saying “don’t let what God has ordained become less than what He intended. To “separate,” after all, doesn’t just mean that you’re breaking up or getting a divorce—it can also refer to a barrier that exists between a husband and wife, causing them to be separated in spirit.

And that’s the “new joining” I see God doing in my marriage. We are being joined in a way that doesn’t leave room for the enemy; we’re learning to fight what comes against us together instead of battling each other; we’re taking our questions to the Holy Spirit as “one flesh” and receiving insight and direction for our unique union. We’re learning to move together, like partners on the dance floor—and I have to say, it’s a beautiful thing. And there’s no other person I’d rather be sharing this dance with than my husband, Byron Kephart.

So today, as I got to spend hours by my loved one’s side, it felt natural; it was comforting; it was unifying. I am astounded at the kindness of God in allowing me to share my love with such a man as the one I said “I do” to all those years ago. I love you, Byron, and you are the one I want by my side as my hair turns gray (grayer) and I discover wrinkles appearing. You are the love of my life, and I’m proud to be yours as well.