The Road Signs That Lead Us Astray or "A Way Out"

I’ve had (that I can recall) about three trigger events in the past week that have led to feelings leaning toward a depression cycle. Though individually small (not insignificant, just not monumental), it’s important to note that people with depressive disorders/tendencies often compile triggers—sort of like stockpiling ammo for an assault. The unfortunate part is…the assault is on one’s self—particularly the mind and emotions, with an impact of varying degrees on the nervous system as well.

When the “final straw” trigger takes place, the ammo automatically fires—and the individual then needs time to calm down and then literally out-think the depression. Depression has such an emotional (and accompanying physical) impact that it can be easily forgotten that the mind—once it gets to a rational state—can be a recovery tool. The challenge is that you may not believe your own logical mind. However, if you can remind yourself that a certain strategy has worked in the past, you may be able to (at least tentatively) trust the method even though you don’t feel like it.

The direction one takes to recover—and return to “happy trails” depends in part on what I like to call “road signs.” These are avenues, paths, on-ramps we have before us, with the option to take them or not. Some may be new, but if we are not new to depression, many of them will be familiar to us. The thing is, some of the signs lead to good places…and some don’t.

On this “road,” there may be a sign that reads “Bed.” If you follow that sign, it leads to crawling in your bed. That could be good, if you are lacking sleep and that is contributing to your depression. But it could be just another way to hide from others and sink lower into it. That’s why you have to have a side road you can follow that is very clear to you. One will say something like “Slight Detour,” the other “Dead End.” The former means that this is just a temporary pit-stop in Bed; the latter indicates that there is no turn-around—in other words, this behavior could last for days. Telling yourself as you enter Bed that “this is temporary” is a good way to remind yourself that you are not going to stay there long. A dead-end means that you will look for excuses not to leave Bed and your mind will go off in terrible “trapped mindset” directions while you’re there.

But if you pay attention to other signs, like “Stay to the Right,” you will make a choice to head toward right thinking, even if you’re not there right now. When you make that turn, you are saying to yourself, “I am not ready to look to God’s Word, reach out to friends, write a blog post, etc. at this moment—but I soon will be.” I have found that I must give myself permission to bounce back. The enemy has been trying everything lately, including faulty road signs with such messages as “The Land of the Free” with a laughing symbol next to it, meaning, “You never really had freedom;” “Hypocrisy,” meaning, “No one can trust what you say now;” and “Reflection Pool”—that destination wants you to look at yourself and see what the enemy is declaring.

A good road sign is one that takes you in the right direction, even if it’s “the long way around.” “Happy Sights” might be one of those. Just the other day I followed that road sign, even though I wasn’t feeling particularly “happy” upon heading out. But seeing beauty and sunshine and changing up my surroundings was extremely beneficial and boosted my mood at least a few notches.

Another trustable road sign might be “Favorite Scriptures.” Often, these are things we believe deep down in our heart of hearts. So we can look at them (our spirit will eventually look to them) and—even if not feeling them now—know that they will not return void. We really do believe these words, so we can grab hold of knowing them to be true in our head until it moves into our heart once again.

In the past, I could not do that. I would even refuse to let my husband pray for me. Of course, I know he prayed anyway—just not with me. I wouldn’t allow myself to be hopeful—things were just “too hard,” “too impossible,” “too unfixable.”

If we are feeling something “in our bones,” so to speak, it might be best that we look for the same extreme in Scripture. Though life may seem to be “too much,” God’s own Word has some beautiful insights as to His capabilities to help us with our crises and needs (with an emphasis on the too’s):

Jeremiah 32:17 - ‘Ah, Lord God! It is you who have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm! Nothing is too hard for you.

Genesis 18:14 - Is anything too hard for the Lord? At the appointed time I will return to you, about this time next year, and Sarah shall have a son.”

Jeremiah 32:27 - “Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is anything too hard for me?

If we can bring ourselves to cry out with a small, however hesitant “Help me, Lord” when we are in the depths of sorrow and despair, He will help. When we reach out to Him, we open ourselves to the possibility of “better” and thus are following the road sign that says “Help.” And the “Help Station” is always open.

The enemy would have us take road signs that lead us astray, such as “Hopelessness,” “Inward-ness,” “Isolation.” Those lead us to perpetuate a cycle that we can’t afford to perpetuate. They lead to beliefs about ourselves that are not accurate, and therefore destructive. Some I’ve been hearing lately include “You aren’t enough;” “You haven’t done enough today to prevent this-or-that or to ensure this-or-that;” “You messed up raising your kids.” So I am leaving my Isolation Chamber and heading out for a diversion activity.

When we listen to those messages—when they control our response, we can’t fulfill our purpose in life, our God-given calling. If we continue to follow those signs, we will continue to be stuck, afraid, and even ashamed. These things I know from experience, from too often taking the road marked “Let’s See What’s Down Here,” which only leads to sinking to lower depths—sometimes so low you think you will never get out.

Instead, though I am no expert, I am fighting to choose to heed the signs I know will lead to hopeful destinations—such as “Beautiful One.” God wants me to see, from His divine lookout point, that the “beautiful one” is me. It is also, of course, you. I am going after signs that read “Something You Love to Do” and “Endorphin Recharge.” Creative and happy-feeling outlets are some of the best things you can do for yourself when you’re on a precarious-feeling road. So is exercise!

I know there are many more signs that present themselves, in both good, bad, and ugly ways—and I’d love to hear some of yours. Let’s help each other become more aware. Let’s expose the enemy’s tactics and become more aware of the Holy Spirit’s paths, or ways. Those signs that sometimes seem to flash at us like a strobe light because God is so desperate for our freedom. Let’s help each other not to ignore them. Nobody wants to end up in a ditch on the side of the road, with no tow truck in sight. Holy Spirit, light up the signs that provide for us a “way out” when we have turned the wrong way, and make the directions easy to follow:

“No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it” (I Corinthians 10:13, emphasis mine).