What constitutes a “buddy”? Is it a term we sometimes use halfheartedly? I frequently call my oldest grandson “buddy” as a term of endearment. He is a buddy, in a sense, because he’s someone I enjoy hanging out with. In the school I worked in this year, some classes had “reading buddies.” Though a great mentoring concept, it didn’t ensure that those students paired together became the best of friends. So, in a more mature context, what does being or having a buddy mean?
I believe that someone one considers a buddy is a person he or she loves to be around and someone who can be confided in. The word “buddy,” by definition, means “a close friend.” This person gets your jokes—and the two of you laugh a lot—but you can also count on this individual to tell you the truth, be thoughtful, and be trustworthy. If you’re with a buddy, you can rest assured that person won’t judge you for going through a rough time—or even making a bad decision. But if you’re being flat-out stupid, they’ve earned the right to tell you that as well—but will likely do so in the most loving way possible.
A buddy will disagree with you—and tell you why. The two of you aren’t afraid to be “real” with one another. This might mean that you talk about disappointments, hardships, and decisions you’re trying to make—and perhaps even your bowel issues. You can feel comfortable, uninhibited, and understood.
At the same time, you share blessings, exciting news, and funny anecdotes with each other. One of the key characteristics of a buddy is that he or she listens. A buddy cares about what is happening in your life, not just his or her own.
A buddy is even willing to try something new once in a while, just out of love for you. It may not particularly be his or her “thing,” but they’ll give it a go because you matter to them. This may, however, exclude bungee jumping.
A buddy is one of your biggest cheerleaders when you’re going through a trial or struggle. They do their best to empathize—and you can feel their unconditional support.
In Anne of Green Gables, Anne says a best friend is “A bosom friend—an intimate friend, you know—a really kindred spirit to whom I can confide my inmost soul.”
Though “buddy” may sound like a rather juvenile word, the practice of being a buddy is anything but. You cannot truly have a buddy without also being one. This is a relationship of mutual admiration, adoration, and commitment.
The shortened form of the word “buddy” is “bud.” Though some may immediately think of “This Bud’s for you,” I prefer to think of a rose getting ready to bloom. In a buddy bond, there is always room for new blooms—new understanding of one another, new adventures taken together, new things to celebrate with each other.
If you don’t have at least one person you’d consider a buddy, I highly recommend getting one. ‘How exactly does one do that?’ you might ask. You have to open yourself up to the idea of someone knowing the real you. Seeing your “dirty laundry” and loving you anyway. Not every person can fit the bill. One way to know if you’ve met someone who’s a buddy is that they tell you how comfortable they feel around you, how much they enjoy spending time with you—but also, there’s an almost immediate sense of mutual trust between you. Having a buddy isn’t something that can be manufactured or simply decided—it grows naturally. And the more it grows, the more thankful the heart becomes. Perhaps this Fabric of Friendship quote sums it up best: “Because of you, I laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a lot more.” What a pleasure it is to have a buddy to call one’s own!
© 2024 Teresa Miles Kephart
