April Apperceptions: Excitement in the Air

Today's writing topic (and the final one of my 30-day challenge): Something you're excited for.

Josiah on the far right, his date, Charis, and friends, Helen and Ryder

Well, today that's an easy one--I'm excited for my son's first formal. This means it's his first time having a date to an event, first time wearing a suit (and shiny black shoes), first time getting to purchase a corsage. The whole nine yards. 

Tonight my Josiah will have the opportunity to be a gentleman--to treat a young lady (who's also his good friend) as the precious, delightful gem she is. To show value, honor, and respect--to think of her as more important than himself, putting his very best foot forward to ensure an enjoyable evening full of laughter and grace. 

Tonight I am proud as I see the boy before me transforming into a man before my very eyes. Offering his arm--as a prince to a princess--as an escort, a friend, a valiant champion. Nobly representing his fellows in the great ball we call growing up.

April Apperceptions: My 21st Birthday

The night of my twenty-first birthday...that seems so long ago.

Well, for one, I was married. Had been for going on three years at that point.

Many consider turning twenty-one a "rite of passage" to legally consume alcohol in public establishments. I had already sampled alcohol before this point--and on our honeymoon, though we were only eighteen and nineteen years old, respectively, we were served champagne at the hotel restaurant where we were honeymooning.

Fast-forward three years down the road. I believe we were living at Witham Hill Apartments in Corvallis. That may have been during the cold spell we had, during which our freezer was accidentally punctured with an ice pack. So we put items in a cooler and set it on the back porch, where it kept quite cold.

If we did have alcohol to celebrate my reaching "drinking age," we may have been chilling it outside in that very cooler. I don't specifically recall, but chances are we may have gone out for a cheap dinner--salad bar perhaps (it was rather a go-to for us in those days), followed by simple alcoholic beverages--with me doing the imbibing, not Byron. He's only developed a taste for certain wines within the last ten years.

I do remember people teasing me and implying that I'd be getting drunk or some such thing, but that was never on my radar--or list of goals. I remember feeling a bit odd that I was now officially in my twenties--instead of just twenty.

I was attending Linn-Benton Community College at the time, taking transfer credits for my education degree. My nights generally consisted of some studying--and dessert. Alcohol wasn't a general commodity, and it wasn't encouraged in the church we were a part of at the time. So I can't be 100% sure that there was any involved in the commemoration of my first twenty-one years of life. But if I could go back to that time, I probably would have gone to Applebee's and ordered a Bahama Mama (I was not to discover those until many years later).

And been carded (which hasn't happened in quite some time). Minus a flux capacitor, we may never know what my twenty-first birthday was actually like. But I do know a couple things. I spent it with the one I love--and I didn't make a fool of myself.

April Apperceptions: The Things I Say

When asked what word or phrase I use constantly, I had to stop and think...what do I say all the time?

I guess it boils down to a few things, rather than just one.

1) "Wow." I say it in response to amazing things people tell me--feats others have done, miracles of God, etc. I also say it sarcastically at times--in the sense of 'I can't believe you just did/said that.'

2) "Maybe/possibly/probably." I'm not a very decisive person, so at least one of these three words rolls off my tongue an awful lot. Also, sometimes if I'm really not sure something will happen (particularly within a specific time period), I don't want to be guilty of giving people false hope.

3) "Mrs. Kephart."As a kindergarten teacher, I've gotten in the habit of referring to myself in third person. When I make a mistake that's sort of funny: Silly Mrs. Kephart. When explaining something new or unexpected I did for the children: You may have noticed that Mrs. Kephart [did such-and-such]. When referring to a desired behavior: Mrs. Kephart really likes it when... In fact, I've used my name so much in this way that one of my kindergartners once asked, "Why do you always talk about yourself in third person?" Yes, a kindergartner! Haha. She had learned the concept from one of her older siblings. Now that I'm more aware, I don't use this form of self-reference as much as I did at the beginning of the school year--but it's still a habit.

Like a teenager, my popular phrases or words of choice tend to go in phases, or fads if you will. They are subject to changes and updates, and sometimes even borrowed from my teenage son. However, though some words and phrases may "pop up" in my vocabulary on a more regular basis than others, I strive for overall variety in the the things I say--and I make an attempt to not be overly annoying by being a broken record.

April Apperceptions: Gray Day

I often wear things that match my mood or that I feel will perk me up somehow.

This morning I felt on the 'blah' side. I wasn't feeling attractive enough to wear anything "cute." Nor did I have the energy to really think it through. So...I went for the old standby pants. They appear tweed-like, though they're just stretchy, comfy material with an elastic waistband to boot--sporting a tiny chevron pattern that is almost unnoticeable.

Only certain tops match this particular pair of pants. I was feeling a bit cold, so I chose my long-sleeved, "fancy," gray t-shirt. It has a sparkly picture of a butterfly on it.

Normally, I would've put on earrings...but I forgot. I did, however, remember to put on socks that matched the sparkly part of my shirt--kind of a turquoise color. And I wore the black casual flats I've been wearing most often of late.

I threw on my denim jacket before heading out the door, as the heater in my car hasn't been working--and remember, I already was feeling cold.

So...it wasn't my most dynamic outfit, but it was comfortable and functional--a winning choice for a worn-out-a-bit Wednesday. Case in point--my kindergartners got an extra-long recess today.

April Apperceptions: Ex Communication

Today's writing challenge topic: Things you'd say to an ex.

Well...when I was in the third grade, I had a "boyfriend." We shared a long-term relationship, for something like three days. Somehow, I began to see some undesirable characteristics. I walked up to him on the playground one day and announced that I was breaking up with him. He looked puzzled, so I offered to give him reasons (which I'd rehearsed several times in my head): "Because you're too short, you're too ugly, and you're too weird." And with those crushing words, I walked off. If I had it to do over again, I probably would've let the poor kid down more gently--but I was inexperienced in such matters.

Now that I am an adult, with many years of relational "expertise" under my belt, I imagine that if I were to see my ex--whom I haven't seen in over twenty-five years--I'd probably express something like the following:

"How are you? I hope you've been well." And if that bit of interaction wasn't too terribly awkward, I'd probably ask what he was doing these days and share a bit about my family. But that would be under the best-case scenario. I have no ill in my heart; nor do I have a desire to re-connect on a permanent basis. But I am sometimes curious--and I hope for the best because I recognize that in spite of the past, God desires the very best for him.

I've come a long way from the too short/ugly/weird days. I believe I would be kind, polite, and cautious--all at the same time. I may never get that chance--or perhaps one day in heaven--but my heart is for a good future for my ex and any almost-exes in my past.

April Apperceptions: My Weirdness Documented

Today my writing challenge is to talk about four weird traits I have. Well, this should be easy. However, to be accurate, I'd best define what a "trait" is. It is "a distinguishing quality or characteristic, typically one belonging to a person." So it's not a habit or preference--but it may be an idiosyncrasy of some sort--which I suppose could include a habit.  "Weird," of course, is all relative. But I shall consider for my weird-ometer those ways in which I differ from most of the people I know.

1) I do not enjoy plants. Sure, I appreciate the beauty of them, but I am beyond un-enthusiastic when it comes to caring for them. I have never been consistent in terms of watering, trimming...basically anything that involves keeping a plant alive. I find it tedious, unpleasant, and frankly too much  work. My dream is to have a personal landscaper and to just enjoy the beauty without any of the work involved to produce it. So I guess you could call this weird trait "botanical loathing."

2) Bent fingers. My middle and pointer fingers on both hands are bent. I was born that way, and it's genetic. My mom's were more bent than mine--and her mother's were bent to an even greater degree.

3) I'm a changer (aka, I pile up laundry quickly). I'm kind of fanatical about sets of clothes. Once I've worn them for at least a couple hours, I consider them "dirty"--and it's rare for me to wear them again. And if I do, you can be certain that I've smelled them first.

4) I like public speaking. Yes, it makes me nervous--but contrary to how that makes most people feel, I actually like it. Most of my friends feel the opposite about public speaking. I've been told that I'm pretty good at it. It's just odd that I can both enjoy it and feel anxious about it at the same time.

And therein lies my special brand of awesomeness, folks.

April Apperceptions: Something I Miss

I read today's writing challenge this morning, thinking that I would need to wait until inspiration finally surfaced. But in the end, I find myself going back to the first thought I had upon reading the challenge topic--"something I miss."

So, here is my profound response...

I miss youth. I miss the lack of adult responsibilities, the lack of gray hair, and the lack of wrinkles (not that I have many yet--but there are some permanent creases). I miss the overall spontaneity my teen years afforded me. I miss the laughter...at nothing. I miss the energy I had.

I miss going to movies with a pack of friends (yes, I can still do so--but there's something about the exuberance of youth that made it a true event in those days).

I miss the relationships I had with some of my junior high and high school teachers. There's something about the rapport with a teacher who likes you that can't be manufactured--or duplicated.

I miss the freedom of weekends spent basically playing, the heaviest "weight" on my back an upcoming typing test. And the freedom to color my hair brightly and wear outrageous outfits without anyone freaking out that I had possibly lost my mind--because, after all, I was young. I could be stylishly impulsive without my sanity being questioned--and I could enjoy it fully.

Yes, I miss the days of my youth. But I also appreciate all that I've gained since. It is normal to have times that we long for "days gone by." We can't go back there. We shouldn't go back there. But...we can certainly treasure the memories, and the glory of a much "lighter" existence.

"Youth cannot know how age thinks and feels, but old men are guilty if they forget what it is to be young." - Albus Dumbledore

April Apperceptions: And I Just Can't Stand...

Today's writing challenge assignment, surprisingly, is for me to write about a family member I don't like. Though there are some I feel more of an affinity with than others, I make it a practice to not dislike family members--using "family" in the broadest blood-relative sense. But...there are some qualities or behaviors that may cause me to desire spending less time with a family member. We'll call these the "family foibles" I just can't stand.

1) Foul language/smut - I am, of course, not above the occasional "bad word" myself--but I don't feel comfortable around those who continually use foul language or have smutty humor.

2) Targeting other family members (i.e., not having anything good to say) - I find it distasteful to hear family members complaining incessantly about other family members.

3) Belittling - It bothers me when family members belittle either their children or spouses. I've witnessed it before, and it makes me very uncomfortable. Nowadays, I'd be more inclined to actually say something--which could, of course, get me in trouble.

4) Judgmental off-hand remarks - Comments that start out with "Maybe you should've...," "I'm surprised you..." (with emphasis on surprised), "We were shocked that you...," "It seems like you would've..."--always with a sarcastic or self-righteous ring to them--are opinions I can live without hearing.

Those are probably the main undesirable happenings in the context of family. I do realize that no one is perfect. But if these indiscretions are present in abundance, they will no doubt contribute to the amount of time I choose to spend with those particular people--family or not. I can, in fact, love someone and not like the way he or she acts.

Overall, I think the items I've mentioned make for a negative atmosphere, I can only control my own behavior--not anyone else's; likewise, the choice of what type of atmosphere I wish to spend time in is also mine. "Family" is a term that suggests value, fun, and even honor. Therefore, I believe time spent with family members should be enjoyable.

April Apperceptions: What's in a Morning?

My morning routine probably isn't that different from many people's.

I groan at the sound of the alarm, use the bathroom, and often lie back down for twenty minutes or more. Then I get up (reluctantly but now with a certain urgency), turn on the light (after warning my husband that I'm about to do so), and find something to wear (some days this takes longer than others).

I take a shower, dry off, get dressed, then put on a bit of make-up. I choose a bit of jewelry, decide what shoes to put on (there aren't many choices), and try to do something with my too-quickly-growing (and graying) hair.

I give myself a final inspection and advance to the kitchen, where I may or may not have packed a lunch the night before. If I haven't, I grab a few items as quickly as I can while checking the clock for quickly evaporating minutes.

I grab my purse, keys, food, and begin to rush out the door. I generally have to go back to my room for something--such as my phone and/or cough drops. Before heading out the door, I say goodbye to Jos and tell him to have a good day.

I get in the car and start the engine. If there's gum in the car, I usually pop a piece in my mouth and turn on the radio--unless it's a remarkably fortunate day and I happen to be drinking coffee--or even more fortunate, I have the time and money to stop for coffee on the way.

Halfway to work, I "wake up" a bit and begin thanking God for my day and asking for His help regarding all that needs to be accomplished, kids who may have a rocky start to the day--and the energy needed to complete my tasks with excellence. I pray for those who are on my heart--needs that are highlighted in my spirit.

Finally, I pull in at my school, park, and let out a "here we go" sigh before heading in. I remind myself that God is with me and that I love my job, so there is nothing to feel uneasy about. It's not every day that I need this reminder--but often. And the more time that passes, the more thankful I am that my day began in the first place.

April Apperceptions: I Don't Put Much Stock in These Things, But...

My mom used to be a bit fascinated by the Zodiac signs, though she wasn't a habitual horoscope-reader. Mostly, she was entertained by the fact that she was a Taurus and that people should stay out of her way if she was ever "fired up." 

Astrology is defined as "the study of the movements and relative positions of celestial bodies interpreted as having an influence on human affairs and the natural world." Though I don't buy into the planets controlling our emotions and things, I do believe that God set up the universe to have everything be interrelated. The weather has an effect on our emotions, so what's to say other things don't? But I don't put stock in horoscopes. I'd rather ask the Lord what's in store for me. But could God speak through a horoscope if He wanted to? He could--and because the Holy Spirit lives in me, I'd most likely know it was Him highlighting something. Enough said on that.

My birthday is February 11th, so I am an Aquarius, according to astrological phenomena. As I read online: "Aquarius-born are shy and quiet , but on the other hand they can be eccentric and energetic. However, in both cases, they are deep thinkers and highly intellectual people who love helping others. They are able to see without prejudice, on both sides, which makes them people who can easily solve problems."

I would agree that I tend to be quiet--and a bit shy--but I do love people, and that pushes me outside my comfort zone. I have been called "eccentric" before--not necessarily "energetic" though. I am, admittedly, a deep thinker. And I look at others with a default to mercy; I make an effort to rid my heart of judgmental attitudes. 

To continue with the description: "Although they can easily adapt to the energy that surrounds them, Aquarius-born have a deep need to be some time alone and away from everything, in order to restore power. People born under the Aquarius sign, look at the world as a place full of possibilities.

Aquarius is an air sign, and as such, uses his mind at every opportunity. If there is no mental stimulation, they are bored and lack a motivation to achieve the best result."

I have to say, I do need my solitary recharge time--and getting away from it all is very important to me at certain times. I don't know if I'm as optimistic as all that, but I do value using my mind--maybe more than is advisable for my own good.

Skipping to the summary found at http://www.astrology-zodiac-signs.com/: "The biggest problem for Aquarius-born is the feeling that they are limited or constrained. Because of the desire for freedom and equality for all, they will always strive to ensure freedom of speech and movement. Aquarius-born have a reputation for being cold and insensitive persons, but this is just their defence mechanism against premature intimacy. They need to learn to trust others and express their emotions in a healthy way."

Admittedly, intimacy hasn't been an automatic pursuit in my life--but I've grown in my ability to develop intimate relationships. I've never been categorized (that I know of) as cold or insensitive, but I know that I can be at times--as a defense, like it says--not because it's what's truly in my heart. 

So, I guess I would say that astrology holds some truth as to my character and outlook on life, but God is the one who put all these things in motion. So the credit ultimately goes to Him for the way I was made and how I function.