Wednesday "Weird Word": Avuncular

Today’s “weird word” is avuncular, which means “like an uncle; of, like or pertaining to uncles.” The first thing that strikes me about this word is that it sounds like something pertaining to a bodily organ.

  

I’m sorry, ma’am—he’s had an avuncular embolism.’ 

Or, ‘What was the cause of death?’ ‘A sharp object pierced his avuncular.’

 

Or it could be something having to do with an avalanche. ‘Road access was closed following an avuncular incident.’

But an uncle? I can hear it now—‘Kids, clean the house. There’s going to be an avuncular visit.’ Translation: Clean up. Your uncle’s coming. 

Can you imagine referring to your uncle’s kids as your “avuncular cousins”? 

I guess it’s sort of like maternal or paternal, but when would you use it? To describe your uncle’s importance in your life as an avuncular influence? That sounds like it could be illegal. ‘He was arrested for the avuncular influence of a minor.’

And since the word also means “like an uncle,” the word lends itself to comments like “Wipe that avuncular expression off your face” and “Well, I’ll be an avuncular relative of a primate” (aka, monkey’s uncle).

It almost has the air of something foreboding—The Avuncular Tales. Or something having to do with Dracula’s lesser known sister, Avuncula.

I suppose that if one were to inherit from one’s uncle, the bequest could be referred to as an avuncular inheritance—that puts a whole new spin on the proverbial “rich uncle” passing away. Which would you rather say, “My uncle passed away and left me money” or “I received an avuncular gift”? Huh? Did someone send you something inappropriate in the mail? To most people, the term wouldn’t be quite clear.

I say that if we’re referring to Uncle Harry—whether he be dearly departed or very much alive—let’s just say so, or suddenly there’ll be all kinds of avuncular visits, gifts, stories, pets, and ailments—and no one will know what in the world you’re talking about.