I know couples who are married with twelve, fifteen-plus years between their ages. My late father-in-law and my husband's mom shared a twenty-year gap. Are marriages with a broad (even generational) age gap any less respectable than marriages between those who are close in age? I would say absolutely not.
But are there challenging issues that occur as a result of that gap? Often, yes. Sometimes the health of the older partner fails sooner, due to his/her more advanced years. Differences in perspective can also occur due to "generation gaps." But are these issues too great for love to overcome, or at least work through? I think not, as I've seen it with my own eyes.
What about in the workplace? What role does age play there? Can a younger person perform in a fast-paced work environment better than a much older counterpart? Sometimes yes...sometimes no. If a person possesses the wherewithal, motivation, expertise, etc. required for a particular position--I say that person should have just as much opportunity as the next person. But...
(You were expecting one, weren't you?) I favor a balanced workplace environment, made up of staff members of all ages--partly because it's what I'm used to. On our school staff, we have several people in their forties (myself included), one in her twenties, one in her thirties, one in her fifties (and one turning 50 this year), and a couple who are sixty or over. I appreciate the fresh, innovative perspectives and ideas of our younger staff members, but I equally value the wisdom and experience-based enlightenment of the more senior staff.
Being somewhere in the middle (though closer to the other end of the spectrum all the time), I feel I've gained a balanced perspective. I can look back on my younger years and be thankful for all I've learned since, while appreciating the ambition and idealism I possessed at that age. It certainly wasn't all bad; I still recall some wonderful units and lessons I devised, and maybe even a few inspirations of pure genius. Likewise, I continue to glean from the practical knowledge of those who've been "in the business" longer than I have. Both are valid. Both are needed.
Is there age discrimination in the workplace? Of course. But so is there sexism, and appearance-based hiring--even business decisions made on the basis of first impressions. But...don't some of us make decisions based on some of those very biases? Not that we mean to--I know I certainly have though. We are human. And that's an element we cannot remove from the equation--ever.
Ageism exists. But what should not exist in our society is dishonor of people due to the number of years they've been on the planet. Unfortunately, it does. I don't think ageism always amounts to dishonoring behavior--sometimes it's just a quiet assumption or judgment. But when it's overt, it can be truly hurtful. Everyone deserves dignity, no matter their age.
There does seem to be a pervasive philosophy in our American culture that "old people" have outlived their usefulness; they no longer have anything to contribute; they should basically be ignored. Where would our society be without the contributions of some of these very people? Many have started companies (that we still benefit from today), raised politicians or pastors or doctors, entertained us. Or they've been the politicians, pastors, doctors themselves.
Reaching a mature age shouldn't negate one's previous achievements--or shining moments. What if we were to treat toddlers as we often do the elderly. I mean, they're not cute little cooing babies anymore. What if we ignored them, simply because they're getting older? Ridiculous, right? Yet, that is often what happens.
My mother always said, "You're only as old as you feel," and I think there's a great deal of validity in her perspective. If people have the drive and the desire to go and do the things they enjoy or are good at, who cares how old they are?
Timothy put it in proper perspective in I Timothy 5:1 - "Do not rebuke an older man but encourage him as you would a father, younger men as brothers,..." Psalm 71:9 admonishes, "Do not cast me off in the time of old age; forsake me not when my strength is spent."Titus, chapter two, emphasizes the role of older women in teaching younger women--particularly in terms of loving their husbands and children in a godly manner.
There comes a point where for each of us the mind may fade and the body grow weak--things we once did, we can no longer do. But the value of a person does not diminish because of what he or she is capable or not capable of. In terms of work, age will always be a factor to some degree--whether we like it or not. But it should never be a license to dismiss or "cast off" a person once his or her work is done. Allow those who are aged the chance to work hard, take pride in their history, and retire well. For this is also how legacy is born.
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